Want to get to know me a little? : Growth
Updated: Jan 29
Happy New Year, you! It's been a while, but here I am with my first post of 2021. Something relatable to many, including myself - Growth. This is going to be about my growth, how I see it and how it should be seen.
As some of you know, I started my blog back in 2018 (nearly 3 years ago) with completely zero knowledge about blogs or write-ups and wasn't a fan of writing as well, but I somehow convinced my way to start writing about life experiences and motivation with the little experiences I had as a 21-year-old to help others in any way possible. Nearly 3 years later, here I am today having launched my blog website officially with confidence.
A short flashback story to many of you who won't have a clue on why this is such a huge achievement for me. Having grown up in different environments with many family members and people surrounded by me I always (ALWAYS!) felt a little lonely and pressured (not necessarily by others, but by me) into being the perfect girl (especially being the first girl of the family) who I never was. By the age of 18, I put the tag 'the naughtiest girl in the family' on me - many people would laugh hearing this as this would be such a joke to them..but not for me. At this point, I almost forgot that it was okay to be imperfect at certain stages in life in order to learn about life better - instead I started feeling bad for not being able to be a good daughter for my mother. As time went by, I started feeling the complete urge to satisfy the people around me through education, work, other activities and what not but none of that worked. It, in fact, created more chaos for me. A lot more chaos than what I already had. I started hiding away from people to avoid being in the "spotlight" and still do. On top of this, most things I put my leg in to started giving back a rather negative outcome. I was stuck. Really, really stuck. That's when I started this blog - Smile today.
Smile today simply means yesterday was the past, tomorrow is the future and today is the only reality so don't listen to anything that is holding you back from smiling.
A little by little, I started writing blogs that I would want to read at my weakest and feel happier reading it. I didn't want to publish my blog to make it official as I didn't know how much of that would make sense when I, myself, is not a perfect person. Only to realise that I don't want to be one. I want to be a human with flaws so that I can improve and get the better of them. I wanted to appreciate my achievement, no matter how big or small they were to other people. Clearly, an achievement is an achievement - nothing less. To my surprise, I started moving away from people physically who I was mentally afraid of and eventually, their complaints and the negative vibes didn't matter to me anymore. I am not a person to cut off relationships at a snip, so I reminded myself of how much I've tried with several people, every time I thought about where we were at one point in life and where we are now. Things started making sense - even if not all, some did and I didn't try to find answers for the rest as some questions should be left unanswered.
At this point, I had a clear view of the people who were actually supporting me to become better and the fact that all that was buried under my worries and fears of those who didn't matter.
To mention again, in these 3 years I have learnt a lot but if you ask me is that all? Then the answer to that question is no! I know that there are a lot of things coming my way - let it be good or bad but I am happy with the fact that I have learnt to tackle those and see myself beyond all those measures. That's what matters the most to me right now.
Good day ya'll :) #smiletoday